The Brainers

Team Story

The Brainers read like a trophy-heavy cornerstone in the GNG archive. Chuck Rittenhouse carries a 217-172-1 mark across 25 CBS seasons, with 3 championships, a best finish of 1st, and an average finish still under review. The league titles came in 2010, 2015, 2022, which gives the record its center of gravity. Division crowns in 2010, 2012, 2014, 2018, 2019, 2021, 2025 show the other half of the job: surviving the East Side or West Side before the Fantasy Bowl ever arrived.

The best regular-season shapes are 2010 (13-3, 1,161.0 points), 2019 (12-4, 1,140.0 points), 2012 (11-4, 1,201.0 points). The scoring peak came in 2025 with 1,859.0 points, the season where the roster had its loudest weekly punch. The finish line says the high-water mark was 1st in 2022.

The Fantasy Bowl trail is where the page gets its edge: 2003 against Big Texs Pillow Biters, won by Big Texs Pillow Biters (Big Texs Pillow Biters 63, The Brainers 42), 2005 against Big Texs Pillow Biters, won by Big Texs Pillow Biters (The Brainers 62, Big Texs Pillow Biters 74), 2010 against Homesick Abortions, won by The Brainers (Homesick Abortions 60, The Brainers 91), 2015 against Alcoholnics, won by The Brainers (Alcoholnics 33, The Brainers 64). Those games are the difference between a tidy standings profile and the kind of story managers still remember when bracket week comes back around.

The CBS Year in Review material adds texture that the tables cannot carry by themselves. 2025: They finished off 2025 with a 129 to 98 victory over The Brainers, giving them a 13 - 4 final record. 2022: Austin Ekeler and The Brainers take the crown. All ten teams started the 2022 season with dreams of a championship, but only The Brainers and Coach Chuck Rittenhouse made it a reality. The Brainers finished off 2022 with a 71 to 45 victory over Homesick Abortions, giving them a 10 - 7 final record.

The game recaps sharpen the identity with specific collisions: 2025 Week 18, Too Hot to Handle: The Big Red Machine 129, The Brainers 98, 2025 Week 17, Winning Ways: Jerrays Jerryatricians 85, The Brainers 93.5, 2025 Week 15, Class in Session: The Brainers 136, Fuck Mickey Loomis 129. That is where the franchise stops being an archive row and becomes a sequence of Sundays, close calls, and bad matchups.

The message board gives the franchise a voice too: Draft Order WITHOUT Superbowl next year. by Big Tex's Pillow Biters - William Hayes drew 2 comments, Good job.. by The Brainers - Chuck Rittenhouse drew 2 comments. Those posts are not decoration, they are the record of how the league talked while these seasons were still alive.

The most repeated collision is Pinko Commie Bastards, a series sitting at 26-19 with a current W7 streak. Rivalry weight matters in this league because division paths are not decorative. They decide byes, playoff access, and which grudges keep getting refreshed.

draft context includes Malik Nabers in 2025, Amon-Ra St. Brown in 2025, James Conner in 2025; 8 keeper records or candidates still give the roster history something to review. For The Brainers, the roster story is part of the franchise story because the keeper era made every August decision echo into December.